


Judas kiss

by Miizurichan



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Cheating, Drama, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-06
Updated: 2016-05-06
Packaged: 2018-06-06 17:33:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6763432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miizurichan/pseuds/Miizurichan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hajime and Tooru had always worked out their differences somehow and remained as close as ever afterward. They always found their way back to each other, yet, this night it was different. Hajime wasn't sure if they could come back from this, not in a long time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Judas kiss

**Author's Note:**

> eh idk really I just wanted a 'what if' scenario, and I haven't written oiiwa/iwaoi in a while so.   
> also emotional/anxious iwa-chan is my fave tbh.   
> enjoy!

It was eerie silent after that night. Hajime almost anticipated that they would fight, but there was only silence. A silence so thick and heavy of discomfort and hurt that neither of them dares break it in fear of what could happen next. It felt like a calm before the storm. Hajime didn’t like it one bit. He’d almost rather be screaming at Tooru and trashing their apartment. 

Yet they didn’t. They didn’t do anything at all. That night, the night it had happened and the night Tooru told him, not even then did they do anything. Tooru had come home, way later than the team dinner had been over, drenched in rain and stinking of unknown perfume. 

Hajime didn’t need Tooru to tell him what had happened, yet he was told anyway. Tooru had cheated on him, and Hajime had only replied “Okay”. 

The morning after, they had met in the kitchen, but didn’t speak a word to each other. Tooru had slept on the couch, Hajime assumed, as he had locked the bedroom door behind him as he went back to bed. 

That morning, Hajime had made his breakfast, made a cup of coffee in his thermo-cup and left. He picked up his coat, picked up his keys, put on his shoes and left. That morning, he didn’t look back. 

When he got to work, he didn’t feel any different at all. From the moment he saw Issei in their shared office, he didn’t feel any different. Not at first anyway. By lunch, however, the events of the previous night had sunken a bit in. Hajime had slowly turned to Issei who was eating calmly and said; “Oikawa cheated on me last night.”. He almost couldn’t believe it himself when he talked about it, but Issei seemed shocked enough to almost choke on his lunch. 

“Are you sure, Iwaizumi?” After coughing a bit, Issei turned toward Hajime with a serious expression. “Yeah, he told me.” Talking about it seemed foreign to himself, but now that he had started, he didn’t feel like stopping. “The fuck do I do, Matsukawa?” 

At first, Issei didn’t answer, then he looked up at Hajime with a frown. “Did you talk to Oikawa about it at all?” Issei couldn’t say he knew much about how to handle a cheating partner, but he knew communication was key to almost anything. He couldn’t, however, deny that heating Tooru had cheated left an odd taste in his mouth. Despite that, he would be lying if he said he hadn’t thought about it once or twice. Especially after those few times Hajime got absolutely trashed and confessed to feeling like he was ‘too stiff’ for Tooru to be satisfied, but didn’t want to tell Tooru about it. 

Issei couldn’t help but sigh as Hajime shook his head in reply to his question. “You have to talk to him, Iwaizumi. At some point you have to.” Hajime knew Issei was right, but the more he thought of it, the less will he found to want to talk to Tooru. 

Hajime wasn’t sure if he wanted to know why Tooru had cheated on him. He wasn’t even sure whether or not he wanted to forgive Tooru and move on from this, or if he wanted to break up and forget he even existed. He didn’t feel like either thing could help, everything just felt wrong. 

He and Issei sat in silence for some time until lunch was over and Issei reached over to pat Hajime on the shoulder. “Look, just follow your gut. You’re allowed to be angry and upset, but don’t keep it all in, okay? I’m here if you need to talk.” With a small smile, Issei moved back to his desk and Hajime was left with his thoughts. 

The rest of the day went as fine as it possibly could have done. Using work as a distraction helped Hajime, but that only helped so long as he was at work. As he stood in the hall of his apartment with Tooru, he felt ill. Like something heavy had manifested in his stomach and made him nauseous. 

Standing there, Hajime thought about walking out again, to avoid Tooru even longer. Yet, he didn’t. He took off his shoes, put his keys in the bowl, walked over to the couch and sat down. Hajime knew it wasn’t long until Tooru came home, but he tried not to think about it. 

Before, waiting was fine, albeit naturally annoying, but now his heart was beating its way out of his rib cage and the uncomfortable lump in his stomach felt suffocating. Hajime hated this, hated how everything had changed in less than 48 hours. A part of him that he didn’t want to listen to, made him think, and he didn’t like thinking. Not right now, not when his thoughts filled him with worry that Oikawa was out cheating again, or possibly leaving him. 

Hajime knew it was wrong, he knew that, but those insecurities he had buried deep within himself, came bubbling up as he was sitting without any distractions. He wanted to hide. It would be so easy to just lock himself in the bedroom again, so easy, but he reminded himself of Issei’s words from earlier. He had to talk to Tooru, at some point, and the faster the faced it, the better it would be. From experience, he knew that letting things brew over time only made things worse. 

Although he left consumed by his thoughts, Hajime was almost hyper aware of the things around him. That awareness included hearing clearly that the apartment door was opened, and another set of keys was thrown into the bowl on top of the shoe cabinet. The familiar squeak of sneakers filled his ears before light padding of feet on the floor came closer. 

He could tell it was Tooru from the way he walked, but there was still something different. The steps felt hesitant, almost scared, yet he didn’t turn, nor did he say anything. A long moment of uncomfortable silence filled the room until Tooru cleared his throat and hesitant steps continued all the way over to the couch where Hajime was sitting. 

Neither of them said anything as Tooru sat down in the couch. Hajime turned to look confused at Tooru as he felt a cold hand hesitantly touch his own. He wanted to pull his hand away from Tooru, but he didn’t. Instead, he turned his hand so Tooru’s hand could fit into his own. 

The action made Tooru’s mouth twitch lightly, but he still didn’t say anything. Turning more toward Tooru, Hajime was reminded he hadn’t looked properly at him since before the events of that night. 

Tooru’s soft, brown hair looked messy and dirty, Hajime knew that was unusual. Despite that, it made him feel a bit better. Looking at Tooru’s tired, sad face made him feel better, but it changed nothing. If Tooru wanted this fixed, he would definitely need to work for it. 

“Oikawa, you can look as sad as you want, but I have no plans to forgive you.” Hajime paused and could see his words made Tooru wince. “If you want this, us, it’s not going to come easy. You cheated on me, and I don’t care about your excuses, because you cheated just as much no matter how, and I don’t know if I can make myself trust you again.” He paused again and noticed Tooru was no longer looking at him, and his upper teeth were planted firmly into his lower lip. But Hajime wasn’t done yet. “I should punch you in the face, curse you out and kick you the fuck out of this apartment, but I won’t. I’m pissed off, and I’m hurt, really hurt, but we’ve been around each other so long that I can’t make a clean cut. I’m going to give you a chance…” Hajime tore his hand from Tooru’s and stood up. His heart was beating so loudly he could barely hear himself think, but he had to do this, had to finish this. 

“… so you better not betray me again, or you’re out of my life. Forever. You have one chance, Oikawa, don’t fuck it up if you actually love me.” The desperately sad look on Tooru’s face almost made Hajime climb onto that familiar lap, but he didn’t. He couldn’t. This wasn’t something he was going to brush under the rug like no big deal, that wasn’t how he was, nor how he ever would be.

**Author's Note:**

> I have no plans of justifying why I wrote this.   
> Rude comments won't be approved.


End file.
